Eliza Brightwen, Before The Grove
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Mrs Brightwen's Last Will and Testament. |
Portraits of Margaret Elder (Eliza's Mother), Ann Harrow (Eliza's Grandmother) & Ann Murray (Eliza's Aunt). Pre 1837. Eliza Brightwen was
born in Banff, Scotland on Saturday 30th of October 1830, she was the fourth
of six children to be born to George and Margaret Elder. George Elder was
a jeweler, and had a shop on How Street in Banff. It was probably
just after the death of her mother, in February 1837, that Eliza sailed
down to England to live with her uncle and aunt, Alexander and Elizabeth
Elder. Alexander was one of the founders of the publishing house of Smith,
Elder & Co, and it was at her uncle's offices (65 Cornhill) that Eliza
arrived after her journey from Scotland. Eliza and her uncle then sat on
top of a coach and traveled down to his country house, Sparrow Hall, in
Streatham.
Eliza's first name was actually Elizabeth but her aunt would not allow her to use her given name, as her aunts name also being Elizabeth. From the day she moved to live with with her aunt and uncle she was called Lizzie, when she adopted the name Eliza is unknown. Eliza loved her uncle very much and he showed her great affection towards Eliza, calling her his `little lassie' until the day he died. Eliza's aunt, on the other hand, was fairly strict, and it seems that she was not able to be a `mother' to Eliza. Life was very lonely and quiet for Eliza at Sparrow Hall as visitors never came to call and her aunt never went anywhere. There were only a few highlights in her first years, once , the son of her uncle's friend came to stay for a few weeks and played with Eliza. Another time Eliza was taken to the printing office of Stewart & Murray in the City, where Eliza found it fascinating to watch the men set the type and working the presses by hand. On another occasion Eliza's brother, George, came to London on his way to India and he and Eliza were allowed to go to St.Paul's and climb up to the top of the dome. Another brother, William, came up to London to enter the Royal Navy as a young officer. Eliza was allowed to travel to Silver's in Cornhill to see him in uniform. In a year or two Sparrow
Hall was sold and the Eliza and her aunt & Uncle moved to Thornbury
Park, near Stamford Hill, an estate of 10 acres A great joy came into Eliza's life when an other uncle gave her a four month old donkey that she was allowed to keep at Thornbury Park. At once Eliza named him Shaggy Bray due to his long hair and spoiled him rotten. The pair were inseparable and the donkey would follow Eliza all over the park. Over 50 years later, Eliza would write a whole chapter dedicated to Shaggy Bray in her book `More about Wild Nature' published in 1892. In 1842 Eliza was sent as a boarder to a school about half a mile from Thornbury Park. This was a time of sheer terror for Eliza as she suffered greatly with shyness and had to try and come to terms with being taught with other girls in classes who were able to answer verbal questions and write dictation etc. She was set difficult sums by a stern master who was unconscious of the thoroughness of her ignorance,. Her stay at the school only lasted for two months as a result of a nervous feverish attack. Ten years after leaving Scotland another important event occurred, in 1847 Alexander Elder decided to sell Thornbury Park and thought he would see something of foreign countries. Whether he sold his interests in Smith, Elder & Co is not known, but he is said to have made a comfortable fortune. Eliza's travels began by crossing the channel to Dieppe in France and then on to Rouen. As her aunt was not very strong, Eliza and her uncle explored the churches and cathedral on their own. After a few days they moved on to Paris, their intention was to stay for the winter and they lodged with a french family. Much of Eliza's time
in Paris was taken up by visiting the many churches and museums of the
city with her uncle, often stopping at old book stalls that lined some
of the streets. Eliza and her aunt & uncle would go the church service
at St.Roch hoping to see the French Royal family who attended regularly.
While in Paris Eliza took French lessons with a master and tried to teach
herself Italian. The winter of 1847 was a very cold one and the rooms in
which they were staying were bitterly cold, causing Eliza to suffer greatly
from Chilblains. It was also a very turbulent time in Paris and Revolution
was much talked about on the streets. In the February of 1848 a Republican
mob forced the abdication of Louis Philippe, and it was about this time
that Eliza and her aunt & uncle left for Brussels.
After returning to England they went to visit Eliza's aunt's sister, Mrs. Birch at Horley Lodge, Horley, Surrey. Eliza met up with her donkey again, as he had been stabled at Horley Lodge whist the family were on their travels. Horley Lodge was a house set in eighty acres of park land complete with two extensive lawns and flower beds, a lime walk that led to a fishing-house overlooking a large pond with a punt. All elements of happiness were in the place itself, but there was one dark shadow that hung over everything, as Eliza says that Mr. Birch was a maniac ( suffered from Mental illness), and was confined to certain rooms in the house under the charge of a male keeper. Mr. Birch had been a medical doctor prior to his mental illness, his wife deemed it best to let him live at home rather than send him to an asylum.
In 1849 they settled down back at Horley into Elderslie Lodge, within a mile of Horley Lodge. Elderslie Lodge was an old-fashioned house set in about an acre of garden with the river Mole skirting one side. In the coaching days it had been know as the King's Head half-way posting-house and hotel, where all of the Brighton coaches changed horses, and there had been stables for over fifty horses. When the railways were opened, many of the old coaching houses were turned into private residences. In the same year, Eliza's older sister Margaret, came to stay at Elderslie Lodge for two weeks. Eliza says that it was a strange meeting as they were sisters in name only, not having met since Eliza was little. Her aunt was quick to quench any sisterly feelings between Eliza and Margaret, wanting to keep Eliza as an `only child' of her own. Margaret's life had been very different to Eliza's, having to help her father to bring up her brothers and sisters at the age of 12 after her mother died. Her father remarried in 1840 to Katherine Thompson and the children found it hard to adjust having a stepmother. George and Katherine went on to have five children of their own. Margaret left Scotland in 1843, aged 18 to complete her education in Dresden, Germany. She stayed and worked in Dresden for 3 years and got engaged to Herman Marcus who was a jeweler. A little later Margaret was employed as a governess which took her to New York in America, where Herman joined her soon after and they later married.
Not much else happened
for Eliza to vary the monotony while at Horley except for a New Year Ball
in London, held by a cousin of her aunt. In 1851 the Great Exhibition was
much talked about and rumors of a fairy palace of glass springing up in
Hyde Park filled everyone's mind with curiosity to see it. In 1854 Eliza was asked to go and stay with Dr and Mrs Price at Stamford Hill, whilst there she went with them to spend a quiet evening with some friends of the Price's. It was at this evening that Eliza was introduced to George Brightwen, who was 10 years older than Eliza. She found George Brightwen a quiet man who seemed more observant than talkative and was not attracted to him at all. George Brightwen had a house and servants of his own quite close to the Price's home and he and Eliza would often meet whilst out walking. A little later Eliza returned to Horley. In 1855 Eliza was again invited to stay with the Prices and whilst at a dinner party she sat next to a young man who Eliza calls Mr.W. For the whole of the evening Mr.W. devoted himself to her and Eliza found him bright and amusing. On another occasion Mr.W invited Mrs. Price and Eliza to go to the Botanical Gardens to see the skating being performed, Mr.W. even managed to obtain a sledge for Eliza to ride upon while he pushed her over the ice. A few days later George Brightwen came to tea and supper at the Prices, while he was there Mr.W. came to call on the Prices wishing to place his hand and heart at Eliza's disposal, a proposal of marriage, and he would take no denial. Eliza would not see him, and begged her aunt to convey her refusal with thanks. Eliza says that she had not the least desire to become Mrs.W. and states her reasons as that they had only met twice and that he was younger than her. Eliza was surprised a little later, when he entered the room, but he had promised her aunt that he would behave properly if he was allowed to spend the evening with them. So Eliza sat with George Brightwen on one side and Mr.W on the other while they played a round game, which she found hard to focus upon as her mind was in a strange whirl. The next day Eliza received a letter from Mr.W. formally pleading for a favorable reply to his suit, darkly hinting of suicide if he was refused. Eliza would have none of it, and wrote a calm refusal on account of difference of age on the wrong side and the absence of affection on her part. This seemed to have done the trick, as Eliza says, the youth had a few grains of common sense and took her refusal quietly. Eliza went to stay in London with Mrs.Birch's cousin, a doctor, for a few days. The doctor had daughters who were Eliza's only friends of the same age. It was while she was there that she received a message from Mrs. Price to return to her as soon as she could. Eliza returned to the Prices, wondering why she was needed so soon. The next set of lines are written in Eliza's own words:- Soon after after the lamps were lighted, in came Mr.Brightwen, looking very pale and agitated. Mrs. Price soon left the room and then, to my dismay, he drew near and made me an offer of marriage. I felt in much perplexity; he was evidently feeling deeply, and I was no coquette to desire for a moment to trifle with earnest, true affection such as he offered me. I did not however, wish to marry, and I was not really at all in love with him; but when I tried to refuse he seemed so pained that I tried to gain time, and said I must consult my uncle and aunt, that I felt esteem and respect but no warmer feeling. He would not press for an immediate decision, but when Mrs. Price returned it seemed somehow to be taken for granted that I had said yes. Eliza was troubled and concerned, for although George Brightwen was a good man, she could not honestly say that she loved him. Over the next few weeks they met at church and George's sister and brother came to the Prices for tea. Another time, the Prices and Eliza were invited to George's house, where Eliza met one of George's old aunts. From this old aunt Eliza heard that George had been a loving son, a kind brother and a dear nephew. Eliza could also see that his servants were very fond of him. Slowly Eliza warmed to the idea of marriage, she felt at home with George and hoped that she would love him in time. So it was settled and Eliza wrote to her aunt and uncle, who came to take her home, while they were at the Prices they were both introduced to George Brightwen. Alexander Elder told Eliza that George was a thoroughly good man and that she had made a wise choice, but her aunt was stiff and cold and did not accept him at all, she thought Eliza could do better than to marry a poor clerk. George was a senior clerk at Overend, Gurney & Co on a salary of 500 pounds a year at the time. It took over 3 months and an eventual talk from Alexander to his wife for her to accept George Brightwen as Eliza's husband to be. Eliza and George were married on Tuesday 5th June 1855, after the speeches at the wedding breakfast, Eliza played a game of La Grace in the garden with her 5 bridesmaids. Eliza and George caught the train to Brighton and stayed the night at The Bristol Hotel and in the morning crossed the Channel to Dieppe in France, where they spent 10 days in Rouen and then Paris, where they spent most of their time attending the great Paris Exhibition. They returned to England to their home, Shaftesbury Villa, Stamford Hill. Eliza describes the house as being a modest little semi-detached house with two sitting rooms which opened into each other, a kitchen with a basement room, four bedrooms and two dressing rooms. Eliza also says that the two women-servants knew their duties, but did not what her duty was to be around the house. She found time was on her hands and spent a lot of time receiving visitors and returning their calls. She also began singing and took music lessons from a tutor, other times were spent modeling clay. In October 1855, Eliza wrote her an essay on the dispersion of seeds, her first attempt to write anything of a scientific subject. It was also about this time that Eliza start to keep a diary, where she wrote, after five months of marriage, how happy she had become, although the visits that she made to people on foot made it feel a trial of great bodily exertion to her. This was the start of an affliction that would be with Eliza for the rest of her life. In January 1856, Eliza began doing voluntary parish work for the church once a week as a district visitor to sixteen families. It was not a job Eliza wished to do, but found it difficult to resist the pressure put upon her not to take the position. She found that she was out of her depth through lack of experience and was unable to council or advise, mearly give sympathy and relief tickets. Another parish duty laid upon her was the cutting out material for sewing classes, both of these positions left Eliza feeling mentally and bodily drained.
In March 1856, Eliza and George went to Horley to visit Alexander Elder and his wife, who were in severe financial difficulties. Alexander had lost all of his capital through the failure of a company he had invested with. They were forced to sell Elderslie Lodge and move to a small cottage in Lancing, near Worthing. In November 1857, George Brightwen left his position with Overend, Gurney & Co, and started as co-manager with Mr.Augstus Keily of the London Discount Company, 8 Finch Lane, Cornhill, London. (Eliza remarks on May 10th 1866 how she is thankful that George had left Overend, Gurney & Co following the companies collapse that day, which sent shock waves around the world.) In December 1857, Eliza makes reference to dining and staying the night with Sir William and Lady Hooker at Kew, and in the morning being shown through the palm and other houses. (Sir William Hooker was director of Kew Gardens). Throughout the whole of 1857 Eliza was in continual pain, often fainting and feeling weak. In February 1858, Eliza went to visit Dr. George Gream at 2 Upper Brook Street, Grosvenor Square, London. As Eliza seemed not to have gained any benefit from seeing Dr.Gream, In June 1858, Eliza went to see Dr. Henry Oldham at 26 Finsbury Square, London, who advised Eliza to stay at home and rest on her sofa for most of her time. George Brightwen had a carpenter make a low desk that Eliza could reach while lying down, here she could still do her clay models, read and write. In August 1858 Eliza felt well enough to travel to Worthing and stay for a while in apartments, by December Eliza was too ill to travel and they stayed at home for Christmas. In March 1859 Eliza was ordered by her doctor to stay in country air, so they took lodgings at Chiselhurst, Kent. After a week's rest Eliza was able to attend church for the first time in nine months. In July 1859 Eliza and George travelled to Saffron Walden, Suffolk, where George's youngest sister, Maria, was getting married to Inglis Palgrave. Eliza makes no reference to 1860, except that she was always in pain and great weakness. In March 1861 Eliza was taken to see Dr.Lee at 9 Savile Row, London. He ordered a quiet life in the country, rest, plenty of nourishing food, and as little to do as possible. Taking the doctors advice, they put their furniture into storage and went for the summer to stay with Mrs.Sidney at Bushey, Hertfordshire, where they had five rooms of their own and a pleasant servant to wait on them. While they were at Bushey they had purchased a `Granville' carriage and a black mare named Besse, so that George Brightwen could drive about three and a half miles to Harrow Railway Station. Mrs Sidney's house was across the road from Fowler's farm, and Eliza comments on the Jersey cows that were imported by Mr.Fowler. According to the 1861 Census for Bushey, Mr Robert Sidney aged 44 (retired farmer), Mrs Harriatt Sidney aged 43 lived in Little Bushey Lane. Mr Michael Fowler aged 75 Widower (farmer), lived at Little Bushey Farm, also in Little Bushey Lane. By December 1861, Eliza and George had taken apartments at 11 Holles Street, Cavendish Square, London. Eliza spent a lot of her time at the British Museum, where she was making a bust of George out of clay. Eliza took the bust to Domenic Luchesi, a model maker in Mortimer Market, and ordered eight copies of the bust to give to members of George's family for Christmas. On the 18th of January 1862 they moved again, taking apartments for the winter at 14 Brompton Crescent, Kensington, London. Eliza spent a great amount of her time at the South Kensington Museum in Brompton Road. The Museum, now the Victoria & Albert Museum, had opened in 1857, born from the profits of The Great Exhibition held at The Crystal Palace in Hyde Park. After spending the winter in London, they returned to Sidney's Farm in Bushey, Hertfordshire, on April 26th 1862. Eliza states that she regained her health over the summer months while staying on the farm. On August 21st 1862 Eliza saved the Sidney's farm house from being burned to the ground. About 3 o'clock in the morning Eliza awoke to the sound of a crackling flames and the smell of burning coming through her bedroom window, a newly made haystack that was close to the farm house had caught fire. Raising the alarm within the household, Eliza sent one of the servants off to tell Mr. Fowler, whose haystack it was. Mr. Fowler bought over his `little garden engine' which kept a steady stream of water onto the blaze. By forming a line of people with pails to bring water from a nearby pond they managed to feed the `engine' for two hours until the Parish Fire Engine arrived to put out the fire. After the Parish Fire Engine arrived, Eliza made a lot of strong coffee, which she carried out to all the helpers. They had managed to save a good part of the hay stack and prevented the Sidney's house from catching fire.
For nearly all of the ten years that Eliza was at Elderslie, she held Mothers' Meetings, which started in April 1864 with six women, but before long there were forty on the books. Eliza said that while the women worked, she would sing a hymn and give a bible explanation. Eliza had many musical neighbours, and they started to hold meetings in each others houses for concerted music and glee-singing. Mr.Cooke was their paid teacher and leader. It must be mentioned that George Brightwen was not without interests, I have just found records stating that he was one of the early members of Stanmore Cricket Club. In August 1864, Eliza & George took a holiday in Switzerland for about two weeks, upon their return, Eliza started a bee-hive of Swiss bees and gained a return of twenty-five pounds of honey one year. During 1865 Eliza became interested in the gipsies that camped on Stanmore Common. A gipsy women named Trinity Smith had become ill from pleurisy and inflammation of the lungs, and for more than a month Eliza visited her almost daily. Eliza would have long talks with her, read the Bible and say prayers before leaving. Trinity Smith had five daughters, all with unusual names, Levise, Centina, Cinnaminti, Cinderella and Siberenia, but one girl at the camp, whose name puzzled Eliza to it's origin was called Leviathan. She was told by the girls father, Mr Hughes, that the girl was named after a big ship, and thought it a pretty name. The Leviathan was the first name given to the ship the Great Eastern, built by Isambard Kingdom Brunel and John Scott Russell, floated in 1858. Eliza became fond of the young gipsy children and resolved to give them a very simple bible class once a week. This was held in the kitchen at Elderslie, as being the only fit place to receive such a ragged crew, much to the protest from Eliza's cook. After a few weeks, Eliza gained the trust of the children, and they became firm friends, believing that Eliza could do almost anything. One day a gipsy boy named Algernon Ahasuerus failed to appear for one of Eliza's classes. When she asked Cinderella why he had not come, she replied ``Plase, mum, he worn't dasent enuff, he hadn't got no trousers". Ever since living at Elderslie, George Brightwen attended St.Peters Church in Bushey Heath, whilst Eliza preferred attending the parish church at Harrow Weald about two miles away, with her husbands permission. The sermons given by the Rev. Joseph Knight, who was the perpetual curate at the Harrow Weald Church, rang very true with Eliza's beliefs in God which deepened her resolve to be a better Christian. In September 1865, Eliza travelled alone to Glasgow to meet George. They stayed in Scotland for about 4 weeks sight seeing and visiting her birth place of Banff. On Sunday Sept 24th, they happened to be in Crathie, and walked to Crathie church, where Queen Victoria, The Prince of Wales and other members of the Royal Family were attending. Various visits are listed, in July 1866 Eliza spent a month in North Wales with George's Sister Maria. In September 1866 Eliza & George visited Norfolk. In July 1868, Eliza visited her sister who lived in Brussels, and in July Eliza toured Normandy with two girl friends. To conclude this chapter, Eliza mentions that in June 1871, her first book was published :- Practical Thoughts on Bible Study. Eliza states, "My First Book!" "It was a great pleasure and was the beginning of my literary adventures, which have brought a great deal of interest and pleasure into my life" Eliza's biography stops on March 21st 1872, just
prior to purchasing The Grove, and starts again 20 years later on November
1892. The reason there is a twenty-year gap may be that Sir Edmund Gosse,
who wrote Eliza's biography, did not have the diaries. Eliza had given
her notes, diaries and autobiography to Sir Edmund back in 1896. Perhaps
her had given them away to other members of her family. I know this is
true of the original notes Eliza made of a visit to the New Forest, as
I located them through her Great Niece, Ann Elder Norz, who lives in Wisconsin
USA who owns some of Eliza's notes and letters that have been passed down
through the family.
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of
gardens, fields and woods. It was Thornbury Park that Eliza began to explore
and observe nature, apart from a music lesson once a week, she was allowed
to roam the grounds and make part of the garden into her own secret hide-a-way.
When Eliza questioned anything she did not understand regarding the natural
history, she came across in the grounds, she was directed to her uncle's
vast library which contained hundreds of books on nature. This gave Eliza
the ability, at an early age, to research her subject in depth.
After
they left Horley they traveled to various places including Weymouth where
Eliza visited the stone quarries on Portland Island. As they were unsuccessful
in finding a house, they decided to stay the winter in Brighton in a corner
house in the Old Steine opposite the Royal Pavilion. Eliza enjoyed visiting
the Royal Pavilion, saying it was just as King George the Fourth had left
it.
Sad
news was bought to Eliza in 1849 when she was told that her brother George
had died of cholera whilst serving as acting lieutenant on board the ship
Hastings in India. It was one of the only times that Eliza's aunt showed
her any kindness and sympathy.
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