Albro Genealogy
*** Just For Fun ***
Everywhere we go there are little signs with witty sayings on them. So here's the Albro Fun Page, with some that we've seen around town. More will be added as we collect them.
It is said there are 3 rings involved in a marriage, the engagement ring, the wedding ring, and then the suffering.
A hangover is the wrath of grapes.
A journey of a thousand miles begins with a cash advance.
Aging: Eventually you will reach a point when you stop lying about your age and start bragging about it.
Ah, being young is beautiful, but being old is comfortable.
A good time to keep your mouth shut is when you're in deep water.
Any one caught shoplifting will be: Stoned, Whipped, Beaten, Hung, and Shot. Any that survive will also be Prosecuted!
A person who expects nothing will seldom be disappointed.
A penny saved is a government oversight.
A picture is worth a thousand words, but it uses up three thousand times the memory.
After 50, if you don't wake up aching in every joint, you are probably dead!!
Always be yourself because the people that matter don't mind, and the ones who mind, don't matter.
Be careful reading the fine print. There's no way you're going to like it.
Being "over the hill" is much better than being under it!
Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.
Birds of a feather flock together and crap on your car.
Business conventions are important because they demonstrate how many people a company can operate without.
Consciousness: That annoying time between naps.
Did you ever notice: The Roman Numerals for forty (40) are " XL."
Did you ever notice: When you put the 2 words "The" and "IRS" together it spells "Theirs?"
Dinner choices: 1. Take it. 2. Leave it.
Dinner is ready when the smoke alarm goes off.
Don't assume malice for what stupidity can explain.
Don't take life too seriously; No one gets out alive.
Do you realize that in about 40 years, we'll have thousands of old ladies running around with tattoos? (And rap music will be the Golden Oldies!)
Back to topEarth is the insane asylum for the universe.
Ever stop to think, and forget to start again?
Even if you're on the right track, you'll get run over if you just sit there. - Will Rogers.
First you forget names, Then you forget faces. Then you forget to pull up your zipper. It's worse when you forget to pull it down.
5 out of 4 people have a problem with fractions.
God must love stupid people; He made so many.
Good Friends + Good Food = Good Times.
Grand children are God's compensation for grey hair and wrinkles.
Ham and eggs...A day's work for a chicken, a lifetime commitment for a pig.
Happiness is Homemade.
He who dies with the most toys is nonetheless DEAD.
He who hesitates is probably right.
How come it takes so little time for a child who is afraid of the dark to become a teenager who wants to stay out all night?
Husband for sale: TV and remote included.
Back to topI couldn't agree with me more.
I don't suffer from insanity; I enjoy every minute of it.
I love cats, but I can't eat a whole one by myself.
If you are what you eat, then I'm fast, easy and cheap!
If you can't be kind, at least have the decency to be vague.
If you can smile when things go wrong, you have someone in mind to blame.
If money talks, all it ever says to me is Goodbye!
If you don't have a sense of humor, you probably don't have any sense at all.
If you think there is good in everybody, you haven't met everybody.
I Have a Degree in Liberal Arts; Do You Want Fries With That?
I'm not a complete idiot -- Some parts are missing.
I smile because I don't know what the heck is going on.
I started out with Nothing, and I still have most of it left.
I used to have a handle on life, but it broke.
Back to topI've reached the age where the happy hour is a nap.
Just give me the coffee and no one gets hurt!
Long ago when men cursed and beat the ground with sticks, it was called witchcraft. Today, it's called golf.
Lord, Please keep your arm around my shoulder and your hand over my mouth...AMEN!!
Money can't buy happiness -- but somehow it's more comfortable to cry in a Corvette than in a Yugo.
Money will buy a fine dog, but only kindness will make him wag his tail.
My husband and I divorced over religious differences. He thought he was God and I didn't.
No outfit is complete without cat hair.
No one has more driving ambition than the boy who wants to buy a car.
No one ever says 'It's only a game.' when their team is winning.
NyQuil, the stuffy, sneezy, why-the-heck-is-the-room-spinning medicine.
One of the many things no one tells you about aging is that it is such a nice change from being young.
Procrastination is attitude's natural assassin. There's nothing so fatiguing as an uncompleted task. - William James.
Procrastinate Now!
Back to topScratch a cat and you will have a permanent job.
Seat belts are not as confining as wheelchairs.
Seen in a vet's office: "We'll be right with you. Sit. Stay."
Smiles are for sharing, always carry a spare.
Some people are alive only because it's illegal to kill them.
Some people try to turn back their odometers. Not me, I want people to know "why" I look this way. I've traveled a long way and some of the roads weren't paved.
Stupidity is not a handicap. Park elsewhere!
The easiest way to find something lost around the house is to buy a replacement.
The gene pool could use a little chlorine.
The journey of a thousand miles begins with the first step. - Chinese Proverb.
The older you get, the tougher it is to lose weight, because by then your body and your fat have gotten to be really good friends.
The stars are always shining, but, we have to be in darkness to see them.
The trouble with bucket seats is that not everybody has the same size bucket.
Back to topThe trouble with life is there's no background music.
The nicest thing about the future is that it always starts tomorrow.
The older we get, the fewer things seem worth waiting in line for.
The original point and click interface was a Smith &Wesson.
The real art of conversation is not only to say the right thing at the right time, but also to leave unsaid the wrong thing at the tempting moment.
The sole purpose of a child's middle name is so he can tell when he's really in trouble.
The way to a woman's heart is through a restaurant door.
There are no new sins; the old ones just get more publicity.
There are worse things than getting a call for a wrong number at 4 AM. It could be a right number.
There's always a lot to be thankful for if you take time to look for it. For example I am sitting here thinking how nice it is that wrinkles don't hurt!
They call it PMS because Mad Cow Disease was already taken.
Thou shalt not weigh more than thy refrigerator.
Wanted: Chief cook and bottle washer. Low pay and long hours.
When I'm feeling down, I like to whistle. It makes the neighbor's dog run to the end of his chain!
Back to topWhen you reach the end of your rope; tie a knot in it and hang on.
Wife and hunting dog missing... Reward for dog.
Will trade coffee for gossip.
When you are dissatisfied and would like to go back to your youth, think of Algebra.
Why is it that at class reunions you feel younger than everyone else looks?
Wrinkled Was Not One of the Things I Wanted to Be When I Grew up!!!!
You know you are getting old when everything either dries up or leaks.
You will always be my best friend..... you know too much!
Young at heart - slightly older in other places.
You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me.
Your husband just called and said you could buy anything you want to.
Worry looks around, sorry looks back, Faith looks up.
We even see them on our computers.
Some of the Best 'Out of Office' Automatic email Replies:
Hi, I'm thinking about what you've just sent me. Please wait by your PC for my response.
I am currently out of the office at a job interview and will reply to you if I fail to get the position. Please be prepared for my mood.
I will be unable to delete all the emails you send me until I return from vacation. Please be patient, and your mail will be deleted in the order it was received.
I've run away to join a different circus.
Sorry to have missed you, But I'm at the doctor's having my brain and heart removed so I can be promoted to our management team.
Thank you for your email. Your credit card has been charged $5.99 for the first 10 words and $1.99 for each additional word in your message.
Thank you for your message, which has been added to a queuing system. You are currently in 352nd place, and can expect to receive a reply in approximately 19 weeks.
The email server is unable to verify your server connection. Your message has not been delivered. Please restart your computer and try sending again.
You are receiving this automatic notification because I am out of the office. If I was in, chances are you wouldn't have received anything at all.
Back to topSmiley Face from St.Louis University Podcast.edu