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Patti's Page
("How Do You Heal a Broken Heart" - The Bee Gees)

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Patricia Melissa Cresseveur
May 24, 1978 to September 23, 1995

Headstone Epitaph:
God saw you getting tired - a cure was not to be.
In His love He whispered: "Young One, bring your love to Me."
With tearful eyes we watched you - suffer and fade away.
We could not bear to lose you, yet we could not beg you stay.
A golden heart stopped beating, a loving child at rest.
God broke our hearts to prove to us - He only takes the best.
Patti - you are always with us,
Mom, Pop, and Jess

Patti left us for the last time, in the way that we knew her since birth, on Saturday, April 1, 1995. In the way that parents do, we gave both her, and her older sister, Jessica, a kiss on the cheek and cautioned both of them to be careful and enjoy their evening. During the course of the evening, Patti became separated from Jess and left with other friends. The next we heard of her was a call from the Emergency Room at the University of Louisville Hospital, telling us that Patti, as a passenger in the back seat of a friend's car, had been involved in an accident and had suffered massive injuries.

Arriving at the hospital, we were told of the full extent of Patti's injuries and cautioned that she would likely not survive through the day. Patti surprised both the medical staff and us by existing in a coma for 19 days. At the end of the period she was removed from life support and we began, foolishly, to believe in the stories seen on TV and in the movies as to Patti suddenly awakening and asking as to what had happened.

Over a period of time, the reality as to a brain injury started to dawn on us. Patti did not get better, she slipped into a "vegetative state" - a sterile term used by doctors to explain that the majority of her brain had been destroyed and it was only God, for whatever reason, that kept her alive. Her arms and legs began to curl into a fetal position, regardless of braces. Her breaths were taken through a tracheotomy and her food through a stomach tube. A "shunt drain" in her skull, which was open on the left side of her head, drained the excess spinal fluid from her body. Physical therapy only postponed, but did not halt, the deterioration of her muscles.

After eleven brain surgeries, and many others to correct a broken pelvis and install the numerous tubes needed to support her, we brought Patti home in early September, 1995. No thought was given on the part of either Jessica, Pat, or myself as to nursing home care, we adjusted our lives and did what was needed to bring Patti home. The living room was turned into a hospital room with numerous machines to support Patti. Our bed was also moved there to be with her 24 hours-a-day. On September 23, 1995, while Pat was in town buying medicine, Patti took her final breaths in my arms, while I attempted CPR and Jess frantically called for the ambulance to make the long trip into the "country" where we live.

This is therefore "Patti's Page". A single web page among the millions that exist on the Internet. It is however, a small way in which I can both honor and remember Patti - and also pray that I face my death with the same degree of love of life and determination in which Patti faced her's. While she never regained consciousness after her accident, Patti taught us more than she would have ever dreamed she could have.

Patti was not a saint while she lived, she was the typical 17 year-old who drove her parents crazy and to whom I owe many of my gray hairs. She did however, possess a presence which her friends speak of - even to this day. Each of us walks through life with a purpose and I feel that Patti fulfilled hers. When you lay your head upon your pillow tonight, say a prayer for Patti - both to help her in the new life she now faces, and also as a thank you to her for what she left behind in this world.

As life's pressures assault you - always keep in mind your children and grandchildren. The hours you work to support them will never make up for the seconds it would have taken to hug them, nor the minutes/hours spent to have listened to them. As adults, we assume that they shall survive us - life sometimes teaches us a different reality.

john_cresseveur@hotmail.com

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