Until recent years some of those wedding gowns were preserved, both material and styles were much as the formal

gown of today, brocaded silks or beautiful and durable satins -- the long, full skirt, some with hoops, would seem

modern today. when Mr. O’Connor went to town on business, especially if her were selling some of the farm

produce, grain or cattle besides, one or two of the boys who helped Hannah or Sarah were his favorite companions

among the older girls. the little mother had them well instructed as to making purchases for the house and for

clothing. They stuck faithfully by his side until he was paid; then, got a good share of the money for the family

needs. He loved to have his children well dressed and was very proud of those who sewed so well. If the girls

noticed that some of his "friends" were following him and waiting for treats, Hannah went back for more money

which he usually gave her. On the way home, they always expected him to ask for the balance, but he never did.

He probably knew that they brought it back to the faithful little mother whom he knew so well. She would have a

little nest-egg for the rainy day, and he left all the needs of the house as well as of the children up to her. He had

plenty to do looking after the needs of the farm or farms, as it eventually became.

After the older girls were married or away from home, Frances seems to have been her father’s pride and joy. She

was beautiful, intelligent and humorous. Going to Chicago once, when she was about 14 years old, he took her

along. Of course, he made sure that they traveled in the best style of the day -- she in silks and embroidery while

he was in top hat, stiff front-shirt and carrying a black thorn cane. He took her on a tour of the city to see all of the

cultural exhibits and anything that would add to her information or education. The Cathedral, the museums and

the art gallery were of particular interest to her. While touring the art gallery, they came across a nude statue.

Quickly and impulsively he struck it with the cane, saying "A sin you are and a disgrace to America you are." He

quickly recovered his dignity, so that by the time a crowd had gathered and the floor walker came he was just

another one in the crowd. Fortunately, he had not harmed the statue, but Frances had a good round lecture on

modesty and what the church demanded of artists and sculptors -- besides people and statues were far more

attractive when clothed, in his opinion.

Some time in the late 1880’s, the carriage or surrey was available, so Michael acquired one. He loved to drive

spirited horses, so much so that his sons-in-law were always in fear that he and anyone with him would be killed.

His own sons laughed at anyone being afraid that their dad could not handle a team of any kind. Of course, he

loved horses and kept them in good condition -- they must be beautiful. That, in itself, was probably an element

that helped to control the spirited horse. They do sense man’s love for them just as children do. Probably one of

the fondest of our childhood days is that of seeing these grandparents driving in quite unexpectedly for a visit. The

family was indeed closely knit; the Galvins and Nolans were rather centrally located between those living in

Carimona, Preston and Fountain, so we had them most frequently over weekends when Mass was not said that

week in Carimona. Today one wonders how we ever handled the crowd that came in for those family gatherings.

Usually it was on a Sunday, so those who had no Mass in their own parish might go in to Preston where there was

Mass every Sunday after the turn of the Century, but at times the Triggs family from Spring Valley (20 miles)

came in on Saturday. Some way we found a place for everyone to sleep and the women worked together preparing

meals. Frequently some brought some prepared food such as a cake, a baked ham or anything to help.

To the children this was a great meeting -- all the cousins and, of course, the attention of fond aunts and uncles.

As some of us grew older and listened in on the conversations, it is a time for satisfying curious youthful minds.

While we were supposed to wash dishes or clear tables, our minds were being fed by the conversation going on

about many subjects. If any of us could play the piano or violin or speak well, we were sure to be called upon, and

we could be quite sure that one of the grandparents or perhaps an uncle would pass a dollar or at least fifty cents to

us. Those were the days that such an amount might buy a good ball or even the material for a nice dress. Why

worry about the cleaning up after the visitors when we had so much fun and such rewards? We loved it all, work

or not.

SOME SIDE-LIGHTS

Though Mr. O’Connor usually displayed a cheerful and humorous disposition, he could put on an appearance of

great strictness. Since he was a large man, a threat was usually quite enough to tame any brashness in his young

folks. As time went on and some of the younger girls observed this, they were inclined to laugh the threat off and

play with him. When they were small, their mother might use a little switch, but their father never. They knew he

would never whip them or use any physical punishment. For a time he took on the habit of threatening then with

his foot or nudged them with the side of his shoe. They discovered that their mother disliked this, so Frances and

Jane -- both bubbling with fun and mischief -- decided to do something about it. One day when the foot went out

toward Frances, she caught it. Though Janie was to catch him if he were to lose balance, she was not able to

support him. He really went down to the floor and they were really frightened. Fortunately, the floor was carpeted

and Janie’s effort did help break the fall, so he merely turned over and with their apologies and help got up saying

he was all right. However, he never used this type of threat again. Basically, he was a humble man or an episode

of this kinds would have angered him greatly. Evidently he was introspective enough to recognize the folly of such

a threat. Though he was generous to a fault and too impulsive, and often too over enthusiastic to be wise, his wife

was his "Queen" and she knew how to handle these things without hurting his initiative.

Sarah was a great favorite of both parents, but especially of her father. However, she was not the traveling

companion as much as she was the most attentive in the home. She loved to sew and take care of anyone who was

ill. When others helped with the garden, the fowl or other miscellaneous jobs, she sewed or was ready to care for

the baby or the sick. With a family as large as this, there was plenty of such work to be done. When Mr.

O’Connor was thrown from a new and spirited horse that he was trying to "break", she took the best of care of him.

In her anxiety and fear that he would go right back to taming the animal, she told him that she would tame it. He,

in turn, gratefully offered to give her the horse if she could do that. To the older boys, who were not too far from

her in age, this was appalling. Sarah, who never did outside work, was to attempt to "break" a horse that their dad

would not entrust them with and that nearly killed their father. She just could NOT do this! Nevertheless, Sarah

was determined to have the horse tamed and to own it, for it was a beauty. She asked to borrow her mother’s nice

side saddle, and John managed to put the bridle and saddle on the animal. This was a triumph in itself -- no doubt

the boys had been trying to handle the horse while their father was laid up in the house. Sarah came out bravely to

ride and John helped her to climb up in the saddle and he led it out a short way. Evidently, the saddle was not

tight enough, for poor Sarah and the saddle were soon hanging on the side of the horse, she screaming and the

horse rearing and pitching in an effort to throw off the burden. Andrew and John came to her rescue with another

horse and soon they had the frightened animal under control. From that time on Sarah was to get much teasing

from the lads who called it "Sally’s horse," even though she never again tried to handle it. He father allowed her

to keep the horse; and, when he sold it, she began saving for a sojourn in South Dakota where her older sister,

Cicily, who was married, had moved.

Another episode that pretty well intimidated Mike and Tim, the two younger boys, and this at the hands of the

older ones, especially might be noted. For those who are not familiar with the styles of those days, let if be first

said that the little boys were dressed in skirts or a sort of kilt until they were four or five years of age. When Mike

-- and soon after him, little Timothy -- began to wear their first pants, which were always shorts with long hose,

they were teased until they hid away in embarrassment. Mother O’Connor decided that this was going too far after

a few days, but it took a good deal of kind persuasion to get the little lads to come out and feel free in their new

attire. Of course, there is a great deal of "give" and "take" in any large family; but, if it is spiced with good humor,

the members have a great deal of fun, and we might say some good discipline and training results, too.

Since most of the children were girls, the dating was done at home. No one even dreamed of going any distance

from home at this time unless chaperoned. The girl usually saw the young man’s home after they were married.

While marriages were not arranged for by the parents just as they were in Europe, we find that there was some

quiet maneuvering going on. Often the young folks knew this, but they accepted the help and advice of the

parents. Religion was of paramount importance but some financial security was also demanded of the young man.

He was expected to have at least a good start on paying for a home, and the ability to take good care of a wife and

children. In this home, all were unusually blessed by God as far as their choice of marriage partners were

concerned. Except for Elizabeth, who contracted pneumonia and died at the age of eighteen, all married Catholics

or converts. Andrew lost his wife and his first two children.

We mentioned that dating took place in the girl’s home. Now was the turn for younger children to have their fun

and mischief at the expense of the older sisters and their dates. Many anecdotes are told of these occasions; and,

unless it became too rough, the parents had the good common sense NOT to interfere. The youngsters were sure

that no punishment would be meted out whole there was company present, but the older members usually found

some means of paying back the trick or mischief. They learned to respect one another in this way if the parents’

admonitions had not been too well remembered.

The O’Connors tried to provide outside contacts and social gatherings in their own home. The sons and daughters

still living tell us that hours of and the kind of gathering were not too different in the 19th Century than they are

today, except that parents took a more active part. Saturday or Sunday nights were the favored nights. More

frequently the group gathered on Sunday afternoon for ball games, a sing-sing, cards, or some other form of

recreation. The, after the evening meal, a dance took place with the "fiddler" furnishing the music needed. These

men often played all that was needed by ear. The dances in vogue were mostly square dancing, the Irish and

Scotch or perhaps a German or Norwegian folk dance, in which both young and old took part. Believe it or not, we

are told by those who were there that it was not unusual for the dancing to last until near morning, when breakfast

was served and then only did they leave for home, most likely to work all day. The only real difference seems to be

that the parents were there and took a good hand in the dancing and the games, and all shared with the work. Of

course, the home needed a good deal of extra laundry and cleaning after such a social splurge. Those were not the

days of the paper napkins or plastic table covers. It was real linen -- an linen that they, themselves, had made at

least until well up in the 90’s. All shared the fun and many hands in this family shared in the work, and had fun

doing it.

Dedicated in fond and loving memories of our dearly beloved Grandmother and Grandfather O’Connor.

By: Sister Mary Redempta, Granddaughter

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