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404 alert icon The page cannot be displayed because you néed some exercise and fresh air

The page you are looking for is currently unavailable. Your ISP has told us that you're on-line several hours every day, and that you just ain't right.

Please, for your own sake, try the following:

  • Don't click the refresh icon button. Go outside now.
  • If you are about to spend another $100 at Amazon, then please contact Amazon Anonymous.
  • To go outside, first click the Cyber Hipnosis menu, and then click Cold Water in the Face. On the Numb Buttox tab, click Sedentary Back Pain. The Get Out of Your Chair settings should match those provided by your local area network (LAN) administrator.
  • If your Evil Computer Addict Persona has enabled it, we can examine your network and quickly discover a way to wake you up from your computer-induced stupor.
  • If you would like Macintosh, Unix or Windows to discover them click stupor icon Detect Computer-induced Stupor
  • There are a host of things awaiting you in the outside world:   fishing, skiing, skeet shooting, triatholons, PTA meetings and dentist appointments, for example.
  • If you are unable to get up, click here and your power strip will emit a large enough shock to scare you back to your senses. If that doesn't work, then we give up. You are officially in need of serious help. Dial 1-800-GET-HELP using your computer's keypad, to reach a mental hospital near you.

  • Click the back icon Back button to melt your computer.
  • blank apple Now... we warned you NOT to click on "that button" on the previous page, but NO, you had to do it. So now you'll have to get back to where you were (or to some other page) the best way you can - don't let us catch you on this page, ever again!